Sex Life: How to Feel Better After You've Gained Weight

4. Decide on what you want to do. You can keep this version of your body, or you can change it. Either way, pick a part of your body that you really struggle with and apologize to it for treating it badly. Focus on showing your body more appreciation in the future.

5. Get moving. And not just for the sake of burning calories. Instead of hopping on the treadmill, try shaking your hips at Zumba for a rush of positive fun, or hit a hot yoga class for a detoxifying sweat. If those options don't interest you, you can always host a private dance party in your own home. (We dare you to not feel sexy while you're dancing to Beyonce's "Flawless" in your underwear. No way, no how.)

__6. Change the rules.__The whole point of sex is to experience a pleasurable moment with someone you enjoy. That said, if you need to turn the lights off or keep your lingerie on in order to stay in the moment, that's OK!

__7. Remember, you deserve pleasure.__Since the day you were born, your body has been changing. It's never going to stop changing, either. So instead of resisting this fact, embrace it. This may not be your favorite season of your body's journey, but don't let that stop you from living a great life, having awesome sex, and going after what you want. Every time your mind drifts to "Ugh, I wish my thighs were smaller," during sex, tell yourself "Stop that!" and stay in the moment. You can make your thighs smaller, but in this moment, you are being intimate with your guy, and you deserve pleasure. Continue to push negative, distracting thoughts out of your mind and let yourself enjoy the moment.

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Akirah Robinson is a writer and therapist living in Pittsburgh. Check out her book, Respected.