"My Husband Has a 'Knight in Shining Armor' Complex"

Tinynovember's husband "Adam" loves to help people, which might seem like a great thing—but it isn't always. Especially when he specifically helps his female friends, and especially when it takes away from their time together.

"[It] doesn't matter where we are or what we are doing. Anyone who needs him gets his attention. It just feels intrusive," she wrote on Reddit. The last straw came when he volunteered their son to tutor his friend's son against his will (at least that's what Tinynovember suspects—all her husband would say was that she "didn't need to get involved, it was all arranged").

"I told him his desire to help people was a real problem to me and that it was something he needs to deal with," she wrote in a follow-up thread. "I told him we need counseling, or at least to start talking about it without just dismissing it as my paranoia and jealousy."

She now feels bad for blowing up at Adam and doesn't know what they can do to save the marriage. Here's what Redditors advised.

"What your husband is trying to do is called 'voluntelling' your son. Without asking, he has assigned your son a task to help someone else because it makes your husband feel good, without any regard to how your son feels about the matter.... I agree that you need marriage counseling." —teresajs

"Your husband has a prioritization problem. He puts helping others over the needs and agency of his own family. That's an issue, no matter what his motives. You've done the right thing by drawing a boundary and insisting that you guys need counseling. Stick to your boundary and enforce it. Set up that appointment immediately and get in there sooner rather than later. Your counselor can help you guys defuse the current conflict as well and figure out where to go from here." —enrichmentonly